There is virtually nothing we can’t try out for 30 days… diets, computer software, interns, fundamentalism. Perhaps this is a side effect of the Millennial generation — we can’t help ourselves if we’re so upbeat and open to change. Or maybe it’s an American thing — out of convenience we’ve created an endless array of options that we try out and give back to the 20th century if we don’t like ‘em. Could be a marketing thing — a sort of test, analyse and optimise method. The fact that I’m a Millennial American that works in marketing makes this particularly difficult to decipher.
Now you know the state of disorientation I’ve been hanging out in, like a bad outlet mall. It reminds me a lot of what it was like when I first moved here… physically doesn’t appear to be too different than home but then you run into a barefoot, but well-dressed, child on the street with a funky accent or get kicked out of gym class and you realise you may have forgotten your green card.
Since Asians are the majority here, I blend in well. So it’s no big deal.
Also a lot like being a women. In fact, we women actually dominate a lot of things… world population, enrollment at Christian college, the nursing industry, parent blogging. It’s no wonder that I’ve hit the time-bar for my own feminist moment. Seriously, having someone else decide my opinions for me, well that would be such a disappointment… like Britney’s comeback tour. Surely, I can do better.
So I’m trying out feminism, to see if the shoe fits. I presume I won’t like it much as it already feels like one too many complaints are weighing down my Dooney and Bourke handbag. And the heels, I think they’re too tall for me, makes it hard to dance when my song comes on. If only feminism made flat boots or partnered with Sperry. God, that would be fantastic.
I think it’s all the egalitarian talk lately… and the Atlantic cover story and the passionate, very sincere, very empathetic rage of mom bloggers. Also, I think it’s that realisation, that I’ve done well to bury for the first two decades of my life, about career/family/self balance that I fear is about to kick my very ergonomical desk chair out from under me any year now. Approaching… like death (that’s a little morbid….) like old age or choosing which college to apply to, testing my moral compass and challenging the infrastructure on which my principles are built.
It’s all very serious and I’ve spent hours contemplating the decisions I’ll make in 10 years from now that could have some terrible long-term effect on my future children who will grow up hating me for not being present enough in their life. They’ll turn to drugs and emotionally detach themselves from our family, which I might know all too well having spent more hours at the office than at home. This will further encourage my self-deprecating inner thoughts (that you can bet your first-born I’ll still be blogging about). And my husband will still love me because he is that good. But I’ll despise myself and when I retake Strengths Finder my top strengths will be things like achiever, competition, futuristic… which really might actually be a nice trade-off from command and significance, my current strengths results (I’ve been working on getting empathy and includer in my top five for years now).
Preach it you buff house-wife!
Clearly, I’m in a predicament, kind of feeling like women should rule the world, or at least have more seats in the boardroom. Fighting the good fight for things like flexible work schedules, maternity leave, and less discrimination while we’re pregnant to be considered for a raise. And should I choose to develop my career before developing my family, I’d still like to go to heaven.
If none of that is possible… I feel I need some good neighbours to live on feminism lane with me, we could do hot yoga and blog more often. I’m exercising my right to impose this 30-day free trial of feminism on you, inviting you to my thought process and a couple of women-focused articles I’ve read lately. The trial doesn’t really expire in 30 days… it expires the moment you decide you don’t have an open mind. (BAM!!!!)
Heaps and heaps of girl power-inspired love to you. Love, me.
// // //
- The kicker… Anne Marie Slaughter, a former State Department official, with her own come-to-(feminist-endorsing)-Jesus-moment. *If you must ignore the rest of my awesome thoughts listed here, please don’t skip this article… well worth reading for men and women alike. // Why women still can’t have it all
- Well, of course… why wouldn’t I want mutuality in my marriage? career? life? Some thoughts from an egalitarian. // Ask an Egalitarian…(Response)
- I have a wrinkle-my-nose problem with submission. It’s accidental, I can assure you. But the thought of selling my soul to submission…. ackkkk, it pains me… go women go! // “How do I submit to my husband and still maintain a sense of self?” {Advice Fair-EE}
- Female presidents, doing their thang. // Malawi’s new president sells off presidential jet and 60 Mercedes
- “Relations between men & women have changed more in the past 30 years than they did in the previous 3000” … When did Valentine’s Day come into play? I bet that had something to do with it. //Does God have an ideal for marriage?
- Dad gets iPad, mom gets flowers? It’s decided: I’m an egalitarian when it comes to gifts. // Father’s Day vs. Mother’s Day [infographic]
- Get pregnant at 25 if you want a high-powered career // Dear 23-year-old-me, You should get pregnant this year. (Too bad we’re too late for that… are there other options?)
- A little fun debate over Slaughter’s Atlantic piece… and the result of what happens when you invite men to the table: “Benedikt: To all the dads: Did it bother you that Slaughter doesn’t seem to consider (in the piece, at least) whether or not her husband, who has been the primary caretaker of their two kids, thinks he has it all?” // Can You Have It All? Talking About the Atlantic Piece That Everyone Is Talking About
- Women totally rock, we are more entrepreneurial. // Why Women Make Excellent Entrepreneurs in the Digital Age
- How Gen Y Women Fare in Today’s Workplace [INFOGRAPHIC] // So we rock, but then why are we still less likely to speak up about our careers, ask for a raise, and feel we’re underpaid in comparison to our male counterparts? Back to square one.
- Unrelated, but another good infographic on millennials. Managing Millennials: Why Gen Y Will Be Running the Country by 2020 [INFOGRAPHIC]
Anddddd…
- …the redeeming end to this entire post of enraged womanly hormones: Men happiest doing the housework: study. Well, no wonder why we’re ready to get out and conquer the world. We were never happy with housework anyway.
Wish everyday was IWD so I could tweet things like this…
Seriously though… balancing career and family is in the penthouse of hot topics in my brain. What about for you? How are you dealing with this enormous impending doom? What are your concerns? Strengths?
*If you’re someone who feels you’ve done this well, please share your secrets and I’ll make you cupcakes (or ask Colin to run to the store and buy them for you).
Tags: finding middle ground.
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